put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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