I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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