i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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