whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Randomize
