I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
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I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize