The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
