i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
