I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Randomize