Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
