I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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