i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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