why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize