Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
