i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
