I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
