omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize