I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
