Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Randomize
