We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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