bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
