We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
