That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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