Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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