Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize