Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize