I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize