was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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