In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
