Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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