You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
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