My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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