i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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