Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
