I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
