Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Randomize