I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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