Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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