ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Randomize