You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Found your dick twin last night
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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