oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
