I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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