can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
