Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
