You really coming over, don't trick.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
