omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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