Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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