you have to choose: penises or morals?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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