***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
