Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
