As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize