I showed him my bush... on skype.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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