Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
