would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize